Uh, isn't that ******** baby? Last time I checked, Boston was happy and perfectly content without to be jumbled up in your little twisted mess. Maybe you should stop trying to be the mom here..
ANONYMOUS
They obviously didn't leave a name and thats fine with me I would be ashamed to leave something like that on someone's family blog as well. I have never once said I was Boston's mother or ever said I gave Birth to her. I have only said one thing that might confuse people "my sweet little B". That is only because I am her step mother and she is my step daughter. I really let that comment get to me more than I should have so here is just some of the support I received that has been helping me sleep at night.
When you marry someone with a kid you take that responsibility of being a step mom. You have done nothing wrong and you love that little girl. It's really sad that people do this and try to put you down. Keep your head up your doing amazing girl!
Being a step mom doesn't make you a bad person. You don't claim to be her mother in anything you post. I'm sorry. And writing it anonymously makes them a coward.
Wow... you have never claimed or acted like your her mom and I think you are doing a fine job. I'm just sorry you have to deal with people like this! I hope that soon they can be mature enough to accept the situation and act as adults. You're doing a great job!
She IS your stepdaughter and you DO have the right to claim to be her step mom. You married her daddy and that makes you family. And your going to grow to love that baby like she is your own baby girl. Its hard to go through but you can do it!
Stay strong cuz its not going to end anytime soon! Your doing a wonderful thing loving that little girl like she is your own! You can tell your doing a good job cuz your making all the haters hate! Keep loving her and disregard all of the negative that comes your way.
Tonya- you sweet gal I love reading your blog because it's real and honest. You're not afraid to stAte your fears. I know you are to Boston and will be a great mama. That's the kind of person you are. So willing to give to others, you put your heart out there and it's a true and honest part of you. I came from a divorced home and just wanted to tell you what the most important thing is. My parents didn't agree or like each other at times but they never talked badly about the other person. I never heard " your mom did this or your dad did this".its something I always appreciated. I just got to enjoy my time with each parent and I saw their love for me! You are a great girl and I know your a great mommy! And I know you love Boston! That's all that matters! Love! She will feel it and see it! Your beautiful !! I'm happy your happy!!!! Love ya girl
I also talked with a girl that was a single mom of twins for 5 years I asked her if what I was doing was crossing the line. And what I should be doing to make this easier she said:
From what I can tell is all you are doing is treating Boston like you are supposed to kind, loving and welcome. Let Boston choose if she calls you mother or Tonya. Never force anything on her. Be there if she needs you and always always treat her like you would treat you kids because she is. You may not have given birth to her but you are going to be apart of her life just as much as her father will be. You are doing nothing wrong. Things like this just take time to settle like everything else.
So hears to my anonymous commenter and follower I would appreciate you not commenting on our family blog anymore. I have way to much good going on in my life to let you bother me anymore. Michael and I are happy we get to be in Boston's life and nothing is going to change that. I will not be afraid to post pictures or say things like "My sweet little B" Because I know my intentions behind everything I do. I will not bullied into silence anymore. I love my step daughter and I love that Michael and I are going to get to spend time with her.
I can only hope for everyone involved in this little girls life that we all start to get along and do what is best for Boston. Michael and I love her dearly.
 |
| So here's to me and keeping the biggest smile on my face though it all! |
13 comments:
I too had a step-mom & it was a horrible experience. She despised the existence of the 4 of us because she felt she deserved better than someone elses used goods. We were ages 1-5 yrs and she never made any attempt to help us feel welcome or loved at her home, instead her disdain & disgust sinned through. There's a lot of abuses involved, but long story short, my dad is still married to her & has had nothing to with us for several years now to keep peace with her. So in essence she won his affections at the cost of his 4 children & 18 grandchildren. It warms my heart to see there are women out there capable of loving another womans child and not punishing innocent children because of their disdain for the biological mother. You are an angel to love Boston & help her feel welcome & loved at your and her fathers home, something I could only ever dream of & hope for, that never came to fruition for me. A child can never have too much love or be loved by too many people!! There's no place for jealousy on either side of a split-parenting situation, it only leads to insecurities & trauma for the child involved. Keep your chin up and keep doing what you're doing, which is loving a lucky little girl! If you do, she'll naturally gravitate to the peace, security, & comfort you offer as she grows! Don't let the voices of jealousy & immaturity get in your head & cloud your goals which are to help her to be a well adjusted, happy little girl who never had any doubt of your love for her!
Much love to you all!
Kim, I am not sure who you are but really THANK YOU! Your so sweet and helpful!!
The best thing one can do with a stepchild is to love them unconditionally!! You seem to be doing just that. The fact that Boston's parents didn't work out is not your fault! Everyone has free will. Boston's dad married YOU!! You two seem extremely happy. When you marry someone with a child, you also marry the child.. This is the saying "I didn't marry the man I married his family." Your doing great with the transition. It's sad Ashlynn has friends who would write hurtful things. As a single mom I would hope when I find someone that my ex will except him and he will treat our child as his own. I would also wish that when he to remarries that his wife will be that "mother figure" to our child when I can't. It's not a fun situation but all you can do is your best. Boston doesn't need a mom. I'm sure she will know you as Tonya and one day if she sees so fit she may call you mom. But that is up to her. Never push her to be what you want. As for pictures take them ALL the time!! You never get those moments back. And enjoy your family! Your beautiful! Keep your head up!
Ok confession...I found your blog because I was curious about all the nasty things being said about you. I don't know the whole story or situation, but let me just say
, I came to your blog expecting to find a blog written by a terrible selfish person. Instead what I found was a girl who is real and who talks about how much she loves Boston, and never has said a mean thing about her mother, even when she writes terribly rude things about you. I have never had to deal with the whole step mother/daughter situation, but I can only imagine it would be very hard to share my daughter with someone else, but I don't understand why someone could be so upset by how much you love Boston. Would they really rather the alternative? Someone who doesn't love their daughter? I don't know you, and honestly I really like Boston's mother, but I really admire your positivity and how you try so hard to not say mean things about her in your blog. It shows that you really are trying to be a good step mother
Thanks you!! It really means a lot!
I am doing the best I can with everything. This means a lot!!
You're doing an awesome job. Don't let anyone's words get you down. I know it's probably hard, but there are so many people out there that know and see how amazing you are.
Boston is lucky to have you as a step mom.
I too found your blog through the vindictive things being said. I couldn't understand why a person would do such things. I see the writing on the wall. It is so sad that Boston's biological mother can't understand the better of her circumstances. I have a step mom that is similar to you. And an ex step dad that was abusive while growing up in his house. Boston will some day look up all of this and realize the mind games were one sided. I do not understand the mean things that are said. You seem to really care. And I have not once read anything you said that was negative towards Ashlynn. Through all of her games and stories she tells, people will start to see the truth. Also it seems to me like she is stalking you. Reading these comments. (Shame on you, Ashlynn) She will not be a real mother until the day she can have her child be loved by someone she isn't fond of and be secure about it. She bashes and then says she is confident, her blog and statuses say otherwise. If she doesn't know you why is she bashing you so harshly?? One reason, she couldn't 'win' Michael. Unfortunately some people have to deal with the grey beyond the rainbows. But her rainbow will soon run out of rain and she will be stuck in the grey. Stay strong, love Boston, and some day you will come out being the better person without having to prove anything to Ashlynn. God speed.
Good God you are CRAZY! UM here is a thought... why dont you stop pretending to be picked on. I guess it sucks that most people hate you and laugh at you unless you enjoy the attention... make up so more comments from people though, it only makes you look even more dumb. its a good thing ashlynn is a better person than most because so many others would not be ok with you. why dont you go find someone else with a baby on the way and go after them... God Speed... lol
Sounds like Ashlynn ^ Tonya didn't write that. Someone that doesn't need Ashlynn's shit did. It's not pretend when it's written over the world wide web that this woman is being bullied. Publicly. You are ok with that?!
Cyber bullying is not something you should handle. I wish I was brave enough to deal publicly with Ashlynn's shit. Still not a harsh word from you.
And I never will. No matter how hard they push I wont let them get to me..
Tonya, you are one amazing person! Even though I have never "physically" met you, you sound like a real loving individual with a HUGE heart! :) I knew Mike in high school and I always considered him a really great friend! You two seem perfect for each other! :) One day I do hope to meet you! Keep it up! You're doing great! It's an inspiration how strong you are! If the anonymous comments do bother you, there is a setting where you can only accept comments from people who have a google account, therefore you will know everyone who comments. I had to do it, because I'm not as strong. I once had a pretty nasty anonymous comment on my blog and I always had my suspicions on who wrote it, but I feel like I know who it was now. Won't say the name, but you'll get it. You're a good person, Tonya! Thanks for being inspiring! :)
Post a Comment